“Whoa, that we should imagine the pain of despicable work! Whoa, that we should feel sympathy for god, and forgive him his mistakes!”
“I forgive you, god, and all horrors you have wrought upon mankind!”
“I forgive you, god, and all your errors! Be there endless mercy upon you! Greatest god: you have my forgiveness!”
“No, NO! I love you god, for you are a perfect machine. All the horrors of this world are the manifest perfection of your design! Praise be to you, and to the horror of all your suffering!”
“God knows not what he does! You must forgive him.”
“God is perfect: he is unconscious and complete.”
…is an unconscious god then not like the dark night, like the space around us, like the rocks beneath our feet?
And if if god is like the rocks beneath our feet…like the core of the earth, like its mantle, like its crust, like the earth itself and the atmosphere around it…like the planets, and the space between them…like the stars, like the universe itself…then what is the difference between that which is god and that which is not god?
Is god then not everything?
Is god then not nothing?
Is god then not simultaneously everything and nothing?
What does it matter, then, to speak of god?
“Where there is language, there is a place where god cannot be explained. All languages become a useless babble. There is nothing you can say, nothing!”
“Praise you ominscient god, oh conscious god! Your consciousness is crystalline, invisible, and all-encompassing. Praise you, for everything is your consciousness and your consciousness is everything!”
If you and I are conscious, do you and I not share properties with god?
“Wake up! Wake up you fools! ALL your thoughts form the opium smoke which spins in mandalas and eddies peopling our deep, narcissistic sleep! Consciousness is without thought or dream or the mechanistic spinning of wheels, the increasingly elaborate and populous machine-like destruction which is the world! Do not mistake thought for enlightenment; do not mistake thought for learning, clarification, or growth. All thought is elaboration; all thought is a virus upon this place, and makes us into a singular devilment, an ever-thickening mold upon the jewel-like fruit which is the earth! Yet if you mistake me and burn the books and theaters you will be an even greater fool! Do not think. Do not make unnecessary elaborations with your mind. And yet do not banish thinking…for thought is like food, which through its digestion replenishes the body as energy, and replenishes the earth as shit and loam! Thought must be consumed and destroyed…but in the bonfire of the blood and brain, and not the in witch-hunt fire which you build through weird delusions of your own! All thought is blasphemy! Or else all thought is worship and praise! Surrender now, for you cannot penetrate the riddle of thought which seizes your mind like the most vicious snapping-shut of a steel trap on the soft paw of an animal…”
Are we then not great egoists to think we may share properties with god?
What if you and I, instead, have nothing to do with god, with the qualities of god?
What if we are distant from god…as a light year…from a star?
And what if knowing god is in fact nothing more than perception itself?
Now…as to the matter of the identity of god (blasphemy! enigma!):
…if god neither chose nor agreed to his identity and role, we might ask what it is to be something which is neither agreed upon nor chosen?
Is this not a matter of one’s essential nature? ….a matter of features which one did not choose?
Is not choosing then not the key which will open the door to enlightenment?
And what of this not choosing? Are we not defined by things which we did not choose, and cannot change? Is not choosing then not the same as god?
Is it then not in god’s nature to be god without knowing beforehand, without accepting or choosing to be god?
“Yes! For god is a calamity which befalls you when you are least expecting it, a calamity which charges down the body like a waterfall, dismantling everything and carrying with it all the objects and false architectures of your life, a calamity which cannot be revoked! There is nothing you can do to prepare! There is nothing you can do to stop it! It will happen to you or it will not happen, and you have no say in the matter; it does not make a difference what you do, what you choose! Be you a massacre-er of babies or an angel upon this earth, you will receive god or you will not…and you have nothing to do with it. It is out of your hands entirely. Cease your thoughts! Acceptance cannot bring you closer!”
“You fool! You have misinterpreted the language and fallen prey to the corrosion of your agency! Stop reading now before you are buried in a pit of confusion and cannot dig yourself free! Go out alone upon the road, and walk this earth guided by your instincts and by your nature.”
And if it is in god’s nature to be a god, does this not imply that god is not the master of himself; does this not imply that there are aspects of god over which god has no control, aspects whose nature god must learn and ascertain…aspects which he must discover and understand?
“But heed! Heed, for god is all-knowing.”
“No! A false declaration! A ghost! For god knows nothing at all! Nothing! God is a dumb and simple witness! God has control over nothing at all; nothing!”
And if there are aspects of god over which he has no control, what is the origin of these aspects? Is the origin of these aspects not the true locus of god?
Is not the true locus of god not the locus of control, but the locus of things which cannot be controlled?
If the true locus of god is not the locus of control…
…is it not the locus of everything which cannot be controlled?
And if that which is essential is the same as that which cannot be controlled (as is the case with our nature, our essential features), is it not therefore inessential to control things…and is it not therefore inessential to act like god…is it not therefore ungodly to act like god?
Is god, therefore not in the least like himself?
And if god is not godly when he is like himself, is it not logical to look for god in ungodly things?
Is it then not logical to look for god where humans scrabble desperately for control, where violence rules, where the most awful things occur, where blood saturates the earth, where decay fills the air?
“Yea, for you have discovered that god is unlike himself, and where god is like himself, all is illusion, and where god is like himself, all is Truth, which is also an illusion, and a glittering lie against reality…for god is ever unlike himself. God is ever in disguise. Where you think you walk in a godless place, god abounds, and no double-thinking of yours can dissolve this rouse, for it is a rouse embedded in the fabric of reality itself, which reality is anyway a fiction of your mind…”
If god did not choose his role, and does not know, or is not able, to act upon his nature, is he then not a slave…is he then not one who is mastered?
And if we believe god must be enslaved by his duty, is it then not our duty to enslave him?
Are you and I not the slavemasters of god?
And if this is not the case, if god fights to be free, or stays quiet so that he may survive, is it then not our duty to emancipate him, so that the battle may be won, so that god may speak?
“Who are we to give voice to god?”
god is our master!”
“God is a benevolent dictator!”
“Ahh, such luck, that he is benevolent!”
“Whoa, that we experience the luck, sheer luck, of god’s benevolence!”
“God is elected.
…and all the world is political, and religion is politics, and politics religion, so that all is delusion, and emotion, entangled in relations of power…so that all is a labyrinth, so that all is intertwined, so that nothing is sound, all is a slick Truth that would turn our glances sidelong upon each other, our eyes warped in the twisted logic of judgment!”
“You are the master of god…
And you are sick, sick! Admit it; admit that you are the sickest master of god!”
And if god does fight his master, if he does struggle against his enslavement, and try to break free, is it not true, then, that we worship a god who is fighting against the way of the world, who is trying to break away from what we have made him?
And if god does not fight, do we then not worship a god who does not stand up for himself, who does not speak?
And if we worship a god who sings in lieu of speech, do we not worship one who sings so that he may survive the identity we have given him?
Does this not mean “god” is a prison?
Are we then not fools, for imprisoning god?
Does god then not master us, through the moral upper hand, through the masteries of a false and bitter karma; does god then not make fools of us…and therefore slaves?
And if god enslaves us instead, does this not mean that we worship a master?
Is obedience not frightening enough…let alone worship? Is it not foolish servitude to worship a master? Is the worship of a master not oblivion, and ignorance?
Is belief in god then not oblivion, and ignorance?
Is denial of the masterful god not the beginning of questioning?
“Fools! All is oblivion! Be you master or be you slave; ALL is delusion and oblivion! There is nothing here for you, NOTHING! Shut your eyes and quit this useless errand!”
Does god not disguise himself, in the end, as this thing we call “nothing”?
…and did god make himself god…
or was god made god?
…And if god is nothing…if he always was, and always will be, does he then not know his own true nature?
If he does know, has he not a concept of self; is he then not a figure of ego?
And what if he does not know?
…What is it to be ruled by an unconscious god?
(Back Door: Enter “Chapbook” into the search bar.)